Technology Headaches

By

Obododimma Oha

Some of us that are not used to modern technology or those used to a different kind technology may have headaches in handling devices powered by modern human technology. To put it mildly, such people are also bad users who quarrel with their tools. Is it in storing and retrieving valued information that one has created? Is it the identification of the appropriate application for an aspect of the information? Is it in handling inevitable problems in modern technology, like one’s computer hanging? Literally, is that device not giving its user some headaches?

Maybe this experiencer should narrate some personal experiences. I was in America for a programme and had the misfortune of wrestling with some technological devices, but learning in the process. Anyway, the story: I had to drop the right amount into the slot in the machine and be cleared first. One is familiar with waiting on a queue and complaining bitterly. Then, the soda would be released to me. I remember going through this process but not getting my drink. Maybe I did not drop the right amount. Maybe. The machine ignored my garagara allegation of “wayo” and the harsh question, “Nothing inside?” Then,  finally finally, the protester had to leave, threatening hellfire. 

On a second occasion, I was to produce my curriculum vitae using the available desktop equipped with a printer. But after typing my document, I did not select the right printer or did not know what to press to get the document printed. I ended up sending the document several times to the printer but succeeded in printing nothing. I was sorely frustrated and just had to leave. Later, I heard that other people wanted to print their documents but it was only my CV that came out. I answered in a low tone that it must have been the handiwork of a powerful juju master and kept my secret.

On another  occasion, I had to photocopy some documents. But, it was between me and the photocopying machine; there was no attendant to do it for me and collect the charge. The same way one, in wanting to buy soft drink (soda)  had to become a seller, too, and the machine was the witness. Nonsense. Finally, I had to leave, hoping that the Economic and Financial Crimes Commission (EFCC) of  my  country would arrest the machine or whoever kept it there.

Perhaps, the most bitter experience some years later in an Abuja hotel was my processing a well-articulated blog article on aviation, using my tablet. But I didn't know what  I must have pressed and the entire document (including its beautiful introduction and excellent conclusion) disappeared. I sweated and searched and searched but did not see it. I concluded that it must have been the handiwork of witches or wizard jealously watching me climb up higher or disgruntled aliens who could not abduct this weak human. In short, I had a poor appetite that evening and a terrible headache.

What keeps reminding me about that experience is the sight of a computer. I know that computers could be a headache, especially in some aspects, like the sudden hanging of the device. This hanging could be very painful. Just imagine this: when one is in a hurry, that is when one’s device chooses to hang. That stupid phone there goes on vacation. That useless laptop refuses to shift the page. Even that idiotic tablet allows strange pop-ups to interrupt. Finally, one in frustration gives up. Nonsense. It is just so annoying, but it is technology headache!

The greatest headache is the impossibility of accessing stored information from a computer because it can't be switched on and one has not been backing this information up! 

I dare not talk about the most recent frustration caused by too much confidence in technology!

So, you now have a little idea of the many "headaches" in this use of technology and in trying to close the gap in such use. One was burned, not just scared of the flames. Yes, one contested with the machine and regretted having ever thought  of such a contest and being naive enough to ask the competitor to complement or become an ally. 

It appears that the competitor cleverly takes over, laughing at one's naivety. The competitor learns to devour or hold up the activity and laughs at the simpleton struggling and hoping for a miracle.

One has even made it worse by making technology multiple, not just special assistant. Mobile phones by the side while one is praying or sleeping or working . Laptop lapped and asking to be fondled so as to cooperate. It had spoken ill of desktop, saying that it was   Old Cargo and Old School, that it should make way for younger blood. And when one is romancing the seemingly irresistible laptop, that jealous mobile phone cries out! Then, of course, there is the ATM that consents or disagrees, otherwise, NO lunch! Of course, one needs this lunch, this  special meal, before taking a tablet from Apple  or Windows. And so on. One has to live or die wired and technologised. And a technologised human has to feel the machine grind inside his or her mind.

The problem now seems to be what to narrate to the doctor about these headaches, the boundary between a  headache and a headache.